†change is inevitable

†

I couldn't even see the street sign as I simply sat there...sat there beings squished by people who just pass...just wanting to get the fuck out of there. Random crowds come and stay but suddenly leave. It repeats...and it repeats.

Waves of people who get in and somebody that...just get out, discovering a whole new path ahead of them.

But for me, like the few left, I trust fate will leave me wherever I belong. I sit there and think about it all: about every single thing that might happen, that might change my feelings, that might bring me joy, that might anger me, that might realize it's myself who's one of the very few still going that road...

A few enter again...but not more than what leaves...

*

A girl, in her late 20s, held a chocolate cake, with a cherry topping that tip of the deliciousness, in her hands, had a rose-filled bag along her side, as she looked for somewhere where she might settle. She thought with worry and doubt for a moment and decided to place herself behind a middle-aged lady. I stare in wonder why she would carry a bag and a cake at the same time...

Suddenly, the lady with the dark red sweater vest beside me, turns and gives me the sweetest smile a middle-aged lady might give...and she parted, leaving me behind with her news. I see her smile immediately vanish, and her stern face reappear as she left me. Maybe she wasn't as bad as I thought?

**

My classmate see me from afar and smiles. I smile back, but she suddenly disappears as people start to blind us from one another. I could no longer find her eyes to talk, but only her back as she shield herself from the others. There was something specifically special about her though. She seemed like one of power, one of independence, but if you knew her, she wasn't that way.

Make up, poorly...or purposely, but on badly around her eyes. You couldn't understand her style, even if you knew her. Her hair defined feminism, her eyes meant pain...all I could get out of there at least. But now I can't even see what I think she means...the skulls appeared on her ears, and I realized that it was too late, I guess.

**

A boy, not much older than 19, looks at me an suddenly realizes that he, like me, too, can relax my body a little tonight. He moves up, and copies my style, removing the clogs of the world. In his ears, held incomprehensible storages of life...incomprehensible to us at least. I envied, in jealousy, the emitter of this incomprehensible life, as I too, wanted to understand my life.

***

A larger, older lady walks fiercely, but with a smile, towards me. Sits herself across the girl with the chocolate cake. They talk...then the larger lady realizes that blonde lady in front of the girl were friends. All three start talking, when the girl with the chocolate cake gets up and leaves her place behind....empty.

As a girl left, a increasing chatter came from in front of the larger lady. Three young people, all well under 20, smile with joy and chat about who knows what.

****

I wonder why they come and go. I ponder upon how they came to be. I wonder what development takes place in these cases. I fail to understand how change is something we must all go through.

It takes as little time as time could exist in to change a person's life.

We see others drift in the scene, and walk away from it. We never know what they'll look like the next time we see them...if ever.

What happened in the past that molded them?

What event, what words were said, what was done to them, what they have done to others?

We all try to adapt to society...but society is so abstract...How can we adapt to society, when we are the ones that define it?

*****

As the road ahead shaped itself so wildly, I had to leave, I had to get out of there before it was too late...

I call out...

I step out...

I walk away...

Only a few left on that passage, the red pulled away...but it had to stop soon. I watched it part from residence commons.

******

Back to reality.

"Hey..."

"Hey, how are you?"

"Pretty good...you?"

"Yeah, same."

We're pretty good to be like this when we can't even fully understand ourselves.

*******

Change...

†